Saturday, March 15, 2008 6:44 PM
hmm. a decision.
i
guess this is a decision i must make to prevent farther unhappy happenings from repeating again n again.. i decided to go home.. once i go home, it will be for good i guess.. not returning anymore.. but i sort of miss my god sisters over here.. i miss the enjoyment of chatting and caring for each other.. if only.. she is not around.. everything might be better.. but.. its also her who changed my god brother's attitude.. so not for her.. maybe my god bro will still be the loner him to me.. hahas.. well.. but also because of her.. i learn a lot.. she is always being a goody when people are around.. act innocent whenever there is trouble.. and in another words, act like an angel whenever there is a 3rd party around.. i used to think she isn't a hypocrite or a person who backstab others.. but then.. come to think of it.. i have been used so many times.. by her.. and i was unaware im being used by her until i sat down and start thinking abt it then i realise how stupid and foolish i was.. i always think that she is can sae part of the family so she should be trustable but i was wrong.. she is even worse than my frens.. she is the type that will use ur trust to her.. she always say that others only treat the people good when they are in need of that person's help.. she always say others not realising she is being that way too.. but im not blaming her for anything.. just that.. i know im that way too at times.. but if u know urself are that way too.. then dun say about others.. somemore.. she always throw her da xiao jie temper around.. sad to sae but im not those who will give in to da xiao jie temper cos i have put up with someone else's same temper for the past 17 yrs of my life.. she always comment abt my sister.. and say my sister this and that.. but somehow.. i feel.. she and my sister is almost the same i guess.. last nite.. i sat down and really think through everything.. then i realise how dumb i am.. hais..
i wonder.. why my heart still beating for u.. daryl.. hais... ur image is always in my mind.. whenever im sad.. i always think of u being funny and silly and ur funny pictures in frenster.. any ger who is love by u.. is a truly happy ger.. becos im sure she will be love and dote by u a lot.. but that ger will never be me.. but my heart continues to beat for u.. for duno what reason.. maybe.. the feelings i had for u.. had already been deeply written in my heart.. till its impossible to erase.. but seeing u happy is already god's greatest gift to me..Labels: decision.heart matters.
Kathleen Sis ❤